My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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