Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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