He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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