My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
