Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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