did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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