he shaved USA in his pubs
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
