I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
