i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Randomize
