I must be too annoying 4 u.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
please come you make the beer taste better
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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