Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Randomize
