You just made me feel so damn special
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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