Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Randomize
