Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Floor bacon is actually really good
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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