Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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