It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i just google imaged poop.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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