Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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