I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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