Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(515): View more from Iowa

Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?

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(805): View more from California

"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me

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(516): View more from New York

she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?

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(647): View more from Ontario

You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(941): View more from Florida

My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.

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(773): View more from Illinois

Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes

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(704): View more from North Carolina

I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.

(580): View more from Oklahoma

It would have only made it one day at my place.

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