ADVERTISEMENT

• (808): View more from Hawaii

  I can't open my eyes

  (925): View more from California

  Lol why not?

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk

  Fav 4 1355 1528

  share tweet
  

• (705): View more from Ontario

  I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.

  Fav 48 2617 4914

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (406): View more from Montana

  Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass

  Fav 20 2436 1584

  share tweet
  

• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'

  (1-902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone

  Fav 8 2729 791

  share tweet
  
• 

  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (281): View more from Texas

  I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.

  Fav 16 5160 1222

  share tweet
  

• (612): View more from Minnesota

  And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.

  Fav 8 4736 2381

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess

  Fav 29 3590 1332

  share tweet
  

• (309): View more from Illinois

  I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.

  Fav 5 1781 1459

  share tweet
  

• (309): View more from Illinois

  This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.

  Fav 9 2017 754

  share tweet
  
• 

  These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (925): View more from California

  Are sex swings allowed in dorms

  Fav 7 1341 597

  share tweet
  

• (862): View more from New Jersey

  Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.

  Fav 2 672 805

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  sidebar: i fucked your brother last night

  Fav 2 664 560

  share tweet
  

• (713): View more from Texas

  Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.

  Fav 4 539 495

  share tweet
  

• (847): View more from Illinois

  You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...

  Fav 1 382 229

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (630): View more from Illinois

  Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.

  Fav 1 577 260

  share tweet
  

Randomize