Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants