You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
