She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
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Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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