You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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