I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
organizing the empties. That sober.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
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