Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
