In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
try to milk me bitch
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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