I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize