Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
