The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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