First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night