Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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