Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
