Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
