Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
