Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
