Her vagina should come with caution tape.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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