Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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