god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
