It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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