It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
