I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
