Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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