barbara walters just said penis...
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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