you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize