Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
