im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
