ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
