I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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