im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize