If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize