How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
